What is good self-esteem? How to improve your self-esteem through social media?

How to improve self-esteem through social media?

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In another one of my blog posts, I talked about how researchers have discovered a strong link between people’s self-esteem and social media. However, according to the research I refer to, the way you use social media matters. The potential of social media to undermine your self-esteem or to improve your well-being depends on how you approach it. How could you take advantage of social media to improve your wellbeing and self-esteem? How could some be of help to you? With this blog post on improving self-esteem and self-development, I hope you’ll find out how you don’t have to avoid using social media in your quest for a better self-image!

How can you improve your self-esteem through social media?

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As such, social media is not a bad thing. In fact, it can support your self-esteem and wellbeing. However, if social media is using you rather than the other way around, consider reducing your screen time. As we have read in the media, we should give social media a break if we start feeling bad about ourselves and the blue light affects our sleep. However, with the right approach, you can also make social media a routine that boosts your confidence and adds to the enjoyment of life! 

Social media is a valid and acceptable way of liven up your life. Not all social media is shallow and void of any merit. It offers an effective channel for finding tools to meet your goals. So pick the best tips below to apply to your own life!

7 Steps to improving your self-esteem through social media

In my seven ways of improving self-esteem I am suggesting ways to harness social media that does not erode your confidence. You’ll find that looking after your wellbeing does not automatically mean reducing or avoiding social media.

Even if social media can become a consuming addiction or a pathetic and superficial vice, you can also turn it into a strength and modern-day resource with plenty of substance.

My positive take on social media gives you 7 tips on how to build your self-esteem by making use of social media. 

I also recommend your read my other popular (R)evolution for Love blog posts linked at the end of this article on self-esteem, self-development, and harnessing the power of the unconscious mind and the subconscious.

For example, read this insightful blog post: How to stop comparing yourself to others in the social media?

 

 To strengthen your self-image and improve your wellbeing, why not start here:

Step 1: Set up a morning routine improving your self-esteem

What does it mean to think too positively? Read the blog post on the dark side of positive  thinking!

Every morning when you wake up, think of three things that are important to you or that bring you joy and that you want to get done or experience during the day.

Your goal maybe to get fit or to improve your relationship. The journey from a couch potato to a fitness icon does not happen overnight. Similarly, the negative aspects of your relationship will not disappear in a day. Therefore, setting intermediate goals is important whatever your goal. All progress is made one step at a time. 

The most important things is to start somewhere. Anywhere! 

Read this article to find out more about setting genuinely positive goals: When positivity becomes toxic. 

Self-esteem can be tested just because you are expecting progress too quickly or you have set too many goals.

You don’t have to and should not fill every day of your life with targets. Often, the wellbeing of a couple can be improved by simply reducing the sense of urgency in everyday life. However, if goal-setting is what makes you tick, set your three ‘goals’ for restful rest day something like this:

  • Enjoy slow breathing
  • Smile at my reflection in the mirror
  • Stay silent and listen to your thoughts with interest
 

If a ‘goal’ sounds too grandiose or demanding, replace it with a ‘direction’ or ‘interest’. You can rephrase your ‘goals’ and successes each day which can make it easier to face challenges and help build better self-esteem.

You might also be interested in my discussion on the reframing of problems and goals in my book

(R)evolution for Love – A Better Relationship or Brilliant Break Up. The book can be ordered as a hard copy with a quick delivery or immediately as an e-book. Having your own copy of the 374-page guide and its nearly 60 mental exercises will prove useful for years to come. Many readers have reported going back to the book on a regular basis after reading it. Read the fantastic reader feedback here!

 

Write yourself a message or enter your goals in your diary with a few words or sentences. Or post them on social media to remind you and to receive encouragement from your friends! You can post a picture reminiscent of your goal or google an inspirational quote as a reminder. And if you haven’t noticed yet, I have shared plenty of those on the (R)evolution for Love Instagram and in this blog – they can be freely shared! Or maybe you’d like to share a song on Spotify or a YouTube video that you find motivational! See the next section for the benefits of this type of social media use:

Step 2 of improving self-esteem: Focus on the essential

Focus on the three goals you named as part of your morning routine. Put all other things aside or at least give them decisively less attention in your thoughts. Remember that the goals you set for yourself each day should only include the three important or positive things you decide on in the morning. We are bombarded by so many stimuli and interruptions on a daily basis that focusing on the essentials take conscious effort. Just three things – the rest is extra!

During the day your thoughts might not stay focused and the social media starts calling your name. But if the content on social media is the images, songs and videos that you posted in the morning in support of your goals, you can put yourself back on track. Possibly one of your friends has been inspired by the content you’ve shared first thing in the morning. 

Seeing people like your goals is a gentle and positive way of holding you to account! 

In addition, if the content you chose to post in the morning was a feel-good post, seeing it again during the day will quickly remind you of your motivation and mental state in the morning.

The more positively charged your post was in the morning, the easier it will be to recapture that same feeling during the day. This is known as anchoring and it is an effective tool to be used in any situation. I’ll talk more about conscious anchoring my other post under the Wellbeing blog category 🙂

Step 3: Pay attention to what is going well today

When your ‘goals’ for your day are complete, give yourself credit. Pause at each achievement, name your success and thank yourself for that success. 

You might be interested in these articles: Say to yourself, for example: “Thank you for creating rewarding daily goals and giving myself the opportunity to focus on these very important things today.” 

Just like when you set your goals in the morning, you should revel in your positive feeling to the fullest and gloat! Go for it!

If you find it difficult to achieve your goals, read these blog posts:

Step 4: Have mercy on yourself

If your goal was of the type “build Rome in a day” (as it can easily be when you are really excited about something) and you fail to achieve it, remember that there is wrong having a goal. Just be realistic and pace yourself. Consider which smaller steps are doable within the limits of your available resources.

For example:

If your goal is to get fit but you have spent the past few weeks firmly parked on your sofa, be happy that you didn’t lie on a sofa all day today like you did yesterday.

If your aim is to improve your relationship and your habit has long been to bitch at each other, be glad you didn’t have a single argument today.

You will always have occasional duvet days or arguments. Those are an opportunity for you to practice being merciful towards your partner and yourself.

It’s energising to dream big and resilience is usually rewarded. However, it is important to remember one thing: stop and listen to yourself and change direction if necessary.

While deciding your goals this morning, you didn’t know what goals other people had set for themselves. 

Sometimes someone else’s priorities may be more important than yours and that’s ok up to a point. Flexibility is an important quality when it comes to your own and other people’s goals. The most important building blocks of your self-esteem is to show mercy on yourself. Practice noticing those moments when you thought to show mercy on yourself. These moments are sometimes easier to identify as failures or blunders. Turn them into moments of mercy and accepting your imperfections.

Many of us want to live a long life. In other words, what we want is for this day to be just another day in a life that continues and evolves in so many ways till the end. We set ourselves goals to develop as human beings. Therefore, be aware of the moments when you are still capable of learning — that is, unfinished — and of the moments when you knew how to be merciful to yourself. Also enjoy the positive feeling of self-forgiveness in full, as it is one of the valuable meta-skills that each of us needs!

Step 5 to improve self-esteem: capture the good moments

Take a photo of one of the things that give you joy each day or even several of all your successes. Save those photos as a source of inspiration and reminders of success on your phone in an album entitled something like “Successes and Inspiration”.

However, if you your goal for the day proves overwhelming and you need to split your goal into parts over next few days, you can still take a photo of what went well or what good you see around you or in yourself. Maybe it’s the sunshine or gentle candlelight. Maybe you just had your nails done and they look amazing! Or is it perhaps a good song you’ve been listening to during the day, or a nice conversation with a friend?

Even if you don’t think today gave you nothing to be happy about, breathe calmly and look at yourself with a smile – take a photo of yourself smiling! Just for yourself. And cut yourself some slack: bad days are allowed.

Remember that you don’t have to share everything on social media. 

The main thing is that you are yourself aware of the good things in your life. 

You don’t want every day to be a celebration, because then you wouldn’t be able to celebrate the special moments. Learn to enjoy your normal daily life, and you’ll find that life is quite good! Life with a capital L.

P.S. Taking pictures of the things that matter to you highlights their significance – this is a scientific fact! Take one picture each day of week of a thing, person, animal, place or situation that matters to you and at the end of each day, look at the picture you took that day and enjoy the emotions it evokes. At the end of the week – and anytime – go back to these meaningful images for a quick mood boost.

Step 6: Smart sharing of successes on social media

First, think about whether you want to save some of the pictures you take on your social media account as well and share the joy with your loved ones. If you don’t want to share pictures with others, change the privacy settings of your post. Did you know that you can choose who sees your posts and hide it from others?

When sharing your winning moments on social media, focus on the moment. Think how you felt about the success and happiness. Be mindful about all your emotions associated with the event as you post the photo. Write a few words to describe your feelings.

When you want to improve your self-esteem through social media, be aware and feel happy about your success and joy before you post it on your wall. Recall your morning goal-setting routine and the reason why you chose those specific goals or points of interest for your day. 

Think to yourself:

  • What is so important to you in that achievement or moment of joy?
  • Why was it meaningful for you (or other people, nature, the entire world!) to be doing, seeing, or experiencing what you did, even in a small way.
  • If there was a certain theme or life value behind your goal or moment of joy, how would you name that theme or value in life?
  • As a single flower is part of a meadow, what larger whole does that one thing you observed or did or experience form a part of?
  • What else did you realise about today or some other day?
  • What will you take with you from this day for other good days in the future?

You can use social media to share your insights with your friends or to write them down for yourself. Store your feelings in your heart for a good tomorrow. The deeper the trace today’s positive feelings leave in your mind, the better!

Improving Self-Esteem Step 7: Practice gratitude before bedtime

If you want to feel even better, don’t just browse through your social media late at night. Browse your own “Successes & Inspiration” photo album.  It will remind you of the many nice little things you have encountered in the past few weeks! Thank yourself for achieving your big or small goals. Congratulate yourself for being able to enjoy small mundane things.

Especially when you are feeling tired and drained, try to find a seed of gratitude inside yourself. As you close your eyes and inhale and exhale slowly deeply, you can feel yourself gradually calm down. It is in that moment of peace where acceptance and gratitude also reside.

If you can’t find your sense of gratitude, the easiest way to find it is to pause and calm down. 

Our instinct might tell us to do the opposite and take action to mend our external conditions to be able to feel grateful. This method is rarely successful, no matter how much we achieve, because out tendency is always to want more. That is why it is important to practice gratitude as a skill. Like with other skill, practice makes perfect also in gratitude.  

As you slow down and calm yourself well before going to bed, your quality of sleep is likely to be better. ‘Sleeping on it’ is a great piece of advice also in building your self-esteem. A good night’s sleep  will make it easier for you get the day started in the morning. You are better poised to move towards your goals.  You will have more energy during the day to acknowledge all the positives and your achievements of your day. Read more from this blog post: Why is breathing important to our health?

Strengthening Self-Esteem: 7 new tips on how to improve self-esteem through social media

In this blog post, I gave you seven tips on how you can gain better self-esteem through social media. At the end of this article, I’ll suggest additional reading that will help you get the most out of your life!

Social media is to many a photo album of happy memories, except that it’s easier to access and edit. Ordering digital photo books can cost a lot of money, and creating one takes time. A snapshot of a happy moment on social media is a quicker and more immediate way of building an inspirational album. 

So if you enjoy it, don’t feel guilty about spending time on social media, but make that time worth your while by using the tips above. Be consciously positive! 

Relax and make the most of your life, improve your wellbeing and self-esteem and harness social media for that purpose.

How to improve self-esteem through social media? Take it easy and enjoy social media with (R)evolution for Love!

Personally, I feel grateful that you are sharing the (R)evolution for Love journey with me including on social media. To me, it represents the morning routine that encourages me to talk about the wellbeing of the mind and to keep the discussion going even on difficult topics. So thank you!

And an extra thank you if you spread this happiness and share the (R)evolution for Love content with your friends! You are more than welcome to like, comment on and share my posts freely on Facebook, Instagram and YouTube. Here are the direct links to the (R)evolution for Love social media channels:

Click here to go directly to (R)evolution for Love Facebook page. 

Click here to access the (R)evolution for Love on Instagram.

(R)evolution for Love Youtube videos can be found here.

Share and consciously spread happiness on social media. In the words of (R)evolution for Love: Spread happiness!

To read more about how to boost your self-esteem in ways other than the positive use of social media, order the (R)evolution for Love hard copy or e-book here!

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